Firstly; There is no such thing as a Miami Heat fan that exists in Utah before the year 2010. In fact, there is no such thing as a Miami Heat fan at all in Utah. The only people that claim to be a Heat fan are people that are assholes. There is no possible way that you randomly decided to be a Heat fan in elementary school. Everyone that grew up in the 90's in Utah grew up watching John Stockton and Karl Malone on the Utah Jazz. And that was your team. The other option would be is that you're one of those kids that was a Chicago Bulls fan because you're "that guy." The only reason you would be a Heat fan is because you like teams that win and you are an asshole. So, for every person that buys a Heat jersey in Utah there is a pregnant mother somewhere that is smoking a cigarette. Think about that when you're cheering for LeBron and the Heat this far west.
Also, if you say that you're not a fan of the Heat but you're a fan of Lebron, shut up. We know what you mean. Ship jumper.
Second: If you're an LA Kings fan, please find your swift exit into hell.
Third; this isn't a statement, but a question. Why are there so many Red Sox fans in Utah? I have tried to figure it out forever but can't come up with it. I see more Red Sox garb cluttering cars in Utah than any other team. More than Broncos, Rockies, anything. It's weird. If that's your team, then that's fine. I don't care, as long as you've been a fan since before 2004 or whatever. More than that, before October 2013. But honestly, is there some tie to a player from Utah going there similar to Steve Young and the Niners? I just think it's odd that you chose the furthest possible located team from Utah as you can get. Whatever the reason is, I just would like to make the connection.
Go Giants.
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