Man Cards Should Be Real.

On more occasions than once, i have asked myself, "Is that a girl, or a boy?" On the same occasions, part of me dies. In the world we currently live in, the line is no longer drawn in the sand. In fact, its not drawn at all. Remember in old movies the women they called Bimbos? Large breasted, scantily clad women who were dumber than the entire cast of The Suite Life Of Zach and Cody. Those women were the idols of their day. The epitome of desireable women. They had no real talent in acting, they just looked good without clothes on. The tables have ever so turned. The dimwitted blonde is no longer prevalent in movies. Its now the dimwitted muscle man. Men who lack real talent in acting, or sports, but get paid to be looked at. Life has turned into one giant Chippendales stage. We get paid to look good without a shirt on. Its no longer about if we are good at what we do, or are actually going somewhere in life. If you want girls, money, and all things desireable, get a six pack and big pecs. I normally wouldn't have a problem with people looking good without a shirt on, it's all the exccess that comes with it that i don't like. You can't just look good, you have to be a jerk, while similtaneously toe the line between man and woman. You can't have a sick pack, hairy legs, a beard and wear regular man clothes. You have to wear form fitting clothes, shave your legs, chest, and face, use lotion, chapstick, conditioner, and worry about the health of your nails, pluck your eyebrows, wear bright colors such as pink, and spend too much time in front of a mirror doing your hair. I have neither a six pack or a big chest, however i can prove that i'm a man. Not only that, i'm positive that i can carry on a far more interesting conversation than most of these meat heads. I'm not suggesting that men should refuse to care for themselves. I shower more than anyone that i know. Aside from that, body odor is offensive, so are long fingernails. However, i have come to a conclusion, that there are certain things that a man should never do. I'll make it into a list.
1. Drink from a straw.
2. Shave your legs, arms, armpits, chest, or face.
3. Wear pink. Purple is more acceptable in darker shades.
3. Spend longer than 20 minutes in the bathroom at any one time.
4. Cross your legs.
5. Sit to pee.
6. Take an excessive amount of pictures of yourself.
7. EVER put makeup on.
8. Use lotion. Even manly flavors.
9. Watch a girly movie alone.
10. Order drinks with umbrellas.



There are plenty of more things i could add to this list. But, i feel as though these are the most important. I am also guilty of a few of these things. I also understand that my manhood takes backseat when i do these things. Remember when you grew up wanting to be a cop or fireman? Those things have been turned into sex idols, and it drives me crazy. You cant grow up wanting to be a regular man. Kids no longer want to grow up to be John Wayne, but someone like Channing Tatum. Why? Good question. I think that the concept of manliness and whats "Hot" needs to be adjusted. Girls need to stop falling all over these men and then wonder why things didn't work out. I'll tell you why it didn't work out, it's cause these boys will never settle down. Rightly so, i might add. Why buy the cow when you can steal the milk and leave the cow desperate? I must also acknowledge that men fall into the same trap. Falling all over girls that have no interest in settling down. Its a two way street. It just seems as though women fall for it more often. At least from what i see. Men need to act like men. Women need to act like women. There is most certainly a reason we are different. The more men i see shave their armpits, the more i feel my manhood and beard grow. Man cards should be a tangible thing, rather than an idea. I know i would have all my corners still in tact. So the next time you fall in love with someone, you should probably do a background check. You might also run through this checklist to see if they might be a "Player" Or a "Him-bo", as it were. Last i checked, lumberjacks aren't overly concerned with hooking up with several chicks, but, more about working hard, being manly, and eating pancakes. They wont break your heart. Just build your house.